Twilight Saga

So i have just read the last book in the series. its as glad as is am to say I've completed the set I'm so sad that i wont be spending anymore time with Bella and the Cullen family. to some it up in a few words id say it was my personal transportation to another world. At times i found myself laughing out loud, crying, and stumbling over words trying to read so fast so i could see what happens next. it was funny at times to see how these books could have my heart racing. needless to say. i really enjoyed them. So now I'm off to call my aunt to get some recommendations she has for me...

What does the Future have in store for me??

Life is so crazy and can be so cold. i dont think its safe to be so sure about anything because as soon as you do you get SLAPPED in the face with the reality of how uncertain everything is. and i mean SLAPPED hard! It seems like the duration of any ones life is just a test of strength and faith. its so hard at times. but i guess you'll never know how strong you are until youre tested or what you will be able to or will choose to deal with. Pass the test and add a notch on your belt, fail and be subjected to an emotional explosion. so i guess its cool either way as long as you learn a lesson about yourself when its all said and done. But as of late it has been test after test for me and im losing my mind. I wouldnt mind it so much if i had a break in between. but its all piling up on me. and I dont want to keep going if none of my hard work pays off. hell i might as well be average and just put in 55% like everybody else. Cuz thats all i get credit for. Its just scary when you notice your fuse has been lit but you have no idea how long its been burning or how close the bomb is. i hope i can survive this explosion

Under Construction

After doing that last survey it dawned on me that I've lost my identity (in a way) to my kids and motherhood. Placing no fault on my babies, just circumstances. After talking to a friend about my kids & my husband who I've seen maybe 3 months in what will be two years when this deployment is over. She asked what do i do to keep sane. i said whatever the kids want to do... and drink wine. She suggested that i do something i want to do and i couldn't think of anything i like to do {for myself} That conversation rose a big question what DO i like to do? Who am i again? I certainly don't feel the same. I feel like Ive grown and matured mentally but just haven't taken steps in my new shoes as the new me. All i do is dance in my living room with the kids to Noggin shows, color with chalk outside and sporadic trips to Chuck E. Cheese or the beach. During naps i try to watch bleach or talk to Steven on the webcam. but neither are things i can do whenever i want. Bleach only comes on on Tues. and me & Steven have a 12hour time difference. With the occasional visit from Lindy and work on Saturday's, that's life. When Steven came home for 15 days of R&R he tried to pull me out of what he calls "Noggin land" so he can have his wife back. Here's my progress so far: My loving Husband got me new clothes, shoes, jewelry and a nice purse & wallet. Then i got a good book, my nails done, some really good new flavors of tea, found some new shows to watch, and downloaded new music. Im also working out my new hair care regimen. (very happy so far) I think getting the kids on a new nap/bedtime schedule should yield some added "Mom Time". I bought a new laptop so it can be more convenient to talk to Steven at any hour but that is slow to show results because im still getting used to having it. (sorry babe) im definitely a work in progress but the journey should be fun. I just want to have some direction about who i am by the time he gets home. but i am aware that i can only get so far because the finishing touches can only be placed by my husband when he gets home.

Survey Says....

I was Tagged by Amanda i dont have too many readers but here goes anyway...

Shampoo: Motions lavish conditioning shampoo i just got the new mane & Tail Herbal Gro so we'll see how that goes

Condtioner: Motions CPR or Mane and Tail

Styling products: Liv, garnier anti humidity smoothing milk thats all

Shower Gel: Caress Tahitian Renewal

Body moisturizer: Eucrin calming Creme lotion

Deodorant: Dove Powder scent

Fake Tan: My melinen

Cleanser: Noxzema mixed with St Ives Apricot Srub

Eye makeup remover: St. ives Cream Make up remover

Exfoliator: St. Ives Apricot Scrub mixed with Noxzema lol

Primer: nada

Foundation: None match me because im polka doted

Foundation brush: Dont need it

Concealer: nope

Powder: Sephora Warm Mocha D50 (sheer coverage)

Blusher: Never

Bronzer: God Bronzed me

Highlighter: nope

Eyeshadow base: None right now but i REALLY want Urban Decay Eyeshadow Primer Potion

Eyeshadows: NARS Cheyenne or Victorias Secret after midnight or any Beauty Rush Shadows

Eyeliner: Victoria Secret Blacklight It has Silver Glitter in it

Eyelash curler: Dont use 'em

Eyelash base: What?

Mascara: Loreal Double Extend & DiorShow in that order

Lipstick: I dont wear it, Cant find a shade

Lipgloss: Revlon Super Lustrous in 010 & 015

Nail Colour: Sally hansen Xtreme Wear #24 Black out, CQ #455 Chocolate Plum

Perfume: Red Door, 212 Sexy depending on my mood

EP 209

So this is the first time in almost a year that ive had to wait for the newest episode of bleach to air. But this time is so different because im waiting for it to air in Japan. Steven called me crazy for waiting for it to come on Adult Swim in english when i have access to every episode on the internet. I was tempted but held off maybe another month and a half watching it only on saturdays. But i caved and now ive seen all the episodes, both movies and im waithing for Episode 209 to be Aired tonight then Subtitled on the fifth. Man i cant wait cuz its really getting good... I wanna go to Japan today.

Awesome Website 1

So i am the self-proclaimed domestic Diva/Hostess with the Mostess if you may. I LOVE to cook, Enternaining, and seeing peoples faces after they taste something i know is really really good. And ive always thought its A good idea to have Conversation Starters Sitting Around at a party. I found this website and called my hubby and we spent a half hour Ohhing & Ahhhing at all the cool stuff on the site. There's a lot of stuff we want for our home like, A door mat that has a finish line or you are here, A dish brush that blows bubbles, a coffee mug that looks like youre wearing a diamond ring, and a shower sponge shaped like a mic. (For all those shower singers like Amanda) My personal favorite? temporary tattoo shopping lists that fit in the palm of your hand. What!?! So im not the only person who forgets the shopping list on the kitchen counter 85% of the time? Good to know. I also found tons of stuff for those parties i want to have, but rarely do. Like birthday candles that look like a joint (yeah a joint lol), Dinner plates with a mirror so you can check your teeth, and cups that put different noses on your face when you drink (see below) they wont work for darker skins but still funny all the same. And random cool stuff like a wallet that looks like a bankroll complete with the rubber band. Its a cool website and im sure theres something everybody could love. Fred is Oh so cool. http://www.worldwidefred.com/home.htm

Solana Beach Super Destroyed Boot...& A Love Hate Relationship

Every day i spend at least 20 Minutes with my "Personal trainer" Cindy Whitmarsh. Who is quite full of Awesomeness. I do her Super Hard Core crazy fitness woman Cardio workout Which is 30 minutes on Mon, Wed, & Fri. Then i do her 20 minute abs and a 30 minute cardio with Kendall Hogan, On the others with sunday off. In other words im trying to lose the baby weight. Cindy and i have this Love/Hate relationship that she has no idea about. I love her, she motivates me, and i have seen results. but during the workout i HATE her guts. but thats all part of it. She's a Nutritionist and obviously a trainer. With some of the best abs ive seen. But what gets me even more is that she has two kids and still looks great. Then after research I've found that she now lives in San Diego! Which is my home town and where i currently live. So she's cooler than i thought. She has trained Junior Seau and many other San Diego Charger players and get this she is the Trainer for the entire Charger Girl squad. And to Get to the point there are these Jeans... I first saw them in Syracuse, NY. And I'm GOING to get them. There are many other reasons why I'm trying to get in shape but these jeans are for some reason special to me and it is a monumental feat that I personally must conquer. and i will... Not that they don't make them in the size I'm in now. but there is a particular size and look that I'm going to achieve. So besides what i can do myself, Cindy Whitmarsh, GNC vitamins, and the most sincere support and compliments from Steven are helping me get there.

Wish me luck.

The most anticipated date ever

So my husband asked me on a date, all the way from Iraq. We're going to see what looks like an awesome, hilarious, witty, just super duper funny movie. Which has one of my favorite actors Paul Rudd in it. Who was soo funny in Anchorman & 40 year old virgin. LoL ... Check out the trailer at this link http://www.iloveyouman.com/ Never have i laughed so hard at just a movie's trailer, looks like good stuff. I cant wait, We're going sometime in March. So, like i said this is the most anticipated date ever. Drinks? yes. Dinner? Most likely. Do we have a sitter? no. Do we have a date set? no. Hell we don't even Know when Steven will get here from Iraq. But we're going on our date. If we have to Order Take out (Preferably Sushi) , Buy the bootleg, put the kids to sleep in their room (where they never sleep), and go in our room and close the door. We're going on our date... Seriously.

Its gonna be fun. :)

Teething

I think Zora is teething. Shes a total monster lately. Shes been really mean to me and Jun which is quite unlike her. My sweet baby girl has left temporarily, and this is who moved in her place. I hope they hurry and come in soon...

The Stevens

I married one, and i made one.

I miss one, and cant get away from the other. ( i mean not even for a shower)

I cant get my son to eat, but i miss cooking for my husband.

I pack the kids in the car by myself. I have drive everywhere while listening to the backyardigans, Yo Gabba Gabba or sing ABC's the whole way. But when Steven is home i never have to touch the steering wheel. Even on 1,281 mile road trips from New York to Arkansas.

They both make me laugh.

They both make me cry.

They are two of my best friends.

We speak our own language.

They both changed my life, each one gave me a key that unlocked a door to a new phase in my life. Marriage, Motherhood, Real life.

We miss daddy, He misses us.

We would all be lost with out the webcam.

I tell Steven countless stories about what Jun is doing everyday, Then me and Jun sit on speaker phone listening to what lifes like in iraq.

We're all anticipating March and ultimately October...

Until then we have Skype.